Never Forget

I can’t believe its been 18 years since the attacks on America.  I remember exactly what I was doing and where I was and what I was thinking when I first heard the news.

I suppose my parents would have said the same about  Pearl Harbor.  I also remember the day John Kennedy was assassinated, even though I was just a little over 2 years old.  I remember asking my mom why the man on TV was crying.

But why do we remember so vividly the bad things, and not the good?

I vaguely remember my first encounter with my future bride.  Of course she remembers it much better than I.  I do remember when we “Officially” met when she brought me a piece of cake at a wedding reception (not ours).  I remember asking her to marry me, and wrecking my car when she said yes.  (Handy safety tip kids, don’t try to drive right after you propose.  Its a bit distracting).

I remember the moment 12 years later when she told me she was pregnant with our son.  And the moment he was born.  Ditto for my darling daughter.

I remember the moment one dreadful Saturday morning walking to work when my sister called to tell me that our mother had died.

I remember the equally dreadful moment i held my Dad’s hand as he took his last breath.

The childhood trips to Disneyland, vacations to Florida,  trips to Germany, time spent with family and friends.    Even stupid, silly stuff like playing schoolyard basketball after school when I was in 6th grade, having to stay after school in detention the ONLY time in my life in 3rd grade.

I don’t want to lose any of them.  But chances are, I will.   My mom passed away from Alzheimer’s Disease, and probably her mom before her.  We’re not sure if Gram had dementia, Alzheimer’s, or was just a crazy old Polish lady.  Or all the above.  And unfortunately, i’m now starting to watch my “other mama” begin to struggle as well.

It terrifies me.  Mainly because I have (not to brag) a great memory.  I have squirreled away more trivial knowledge than you can ever imagine. (handy safety tip two, DON’T play Trivial Pursuit with me.  You’re gonna lose) I have an almost savant-like recall for old movies, tv shows, and the presidents.    And i used to have a lightning recall of these facts.  Now i find myself struggling to remember many of those tidbits.  I can eventually, but its taking longer and longer.  And if I lose that, all I’ll have left is my looks.  And we ALL know that’s not good.